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Such practices have now almost universally disappeared in America in favor of the personal proposal by the young man to the chosen one.
The change has been due to the general adoption of the American concept of romantic love as the basis for marriage.
These youth, living many miles from their parents in the agricultural villages, meet informally, develop a rudimentary "dating" system, and eventually fall in love and marry, with or without parental consent, and sometimes avoiding the traditional customs of bride price, betrothal rituals, and family-oriented wedding celebrations in the villages.
As a result, major tensions and disaffection develop sometimes between traditional parents and their modernized offspring.
(Daniel Chodowiecki's painting "Mennonite Proposal for Marriage" illustrates this.) After some visiting among relatives the wedding would take place, usually in two weeks after the engagement.European youth tend to go out in groups, and pair dating is not likely to begin until the late teens, or until there is serious intent to find a spouse.The older European customs are reflected still today among the Old Order Amish, Old Order Mennonites, Old Colony Mennonites, Hutterites, and the Church of God in Christ, Mennonite (CGC).Anyone who disregarded the rule was subject to church censure.Even such groups as permitted the young people to make their own promise of marriage required them to obtain the consent of their parents.
In conformity with general medieval practice Anabaptists expected to supervise and direct the marriage arrangements for their young people.